Annette Funicello
The Disneyland Diva
A Stuff 'n' Laura Production
by Don Charles Hampton and Laura Pinto
Who's the fairest Mouseketeer of all? The bitchin'est babe on the beach? The original Candy Girl, years before The Archies minted the name in their million-selling song "Sugar, Sugar?" You don't have to scroll down to the bottom of the page to read the answer: It's Annette Funicello! She neither aspired to become an actress nor a singer (and, according to some critics, she never did), but soon after trading in her mouse ears for high heels, she starred in nine feature films, scored five Top Forty hits, and made history as one of Rock'n'Roll's earliest female stars.
Annette was just four when her family moved from Utica, New York, to southern California, eventually settling in Studio City. During Easter week of 1955, she danced the lead in "Swan Lake" at her ballet school's year-end recital. In the audience was Walt Disney, scouting for talented kids to cast in his forthcoming television show "The Mickey Mouse Club." Mama Funicello's baby girl won the 24th, and final, set of mouse ears. Over the next three years, her supple dancer's body blossomed into womanhood, triggering hormone attacks in pubescent boys all over the country! Millions tuned in every afternoon for the free lessons in feminine anatomy that Annette unwittingly provided.
Less Paul.
